Today's moustache:
Dr. Phil
Dr. Phil McGraw has a PhD in Moustachology. He has been the host of his own show (named after himself) for the greater part of a decade. On the show, his moustache dishes out "tough love"... the only kind of love that a moustache like his can have.
Although Dr. Phil's credentials, value, and status as a clinical psychologist are frequently questioned, the man continues to rake in millions of dollars each year from his books and show. This is probably because his main credential is his moustache, and it clearly leaves no room for doubt.
Dr. Phil's moustache was nominated for an Academy Award for its role in Scary Movie 4, the first time facial hair has been nominated for the award instead of the person sporting it. It lost to Christoph Waltz's Hans Landa from Inglorious Basterds.
 |
| No moustache, but a better performance nonetheless. |
After the loss, Dr. Phil's moustache went into a severe depression and began rebelling and experimenting with drugs. Dr. Phil sent the moustache to boot camp, where it is expected to make a full recovery.
At least until sweeps week.
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